Changes
by ObsessiveDevil
Summary: Roy and Ed having a little chat about how, sometimes, dreams can change. Parental/romance, depending on how you look at it. Christmas present for Diana, but of course, others may enjoy it as well!


**Changes**

**FMA Fan Fiction**

**ObsessiveDevil23**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, I'm not making any money from this.**

Roy/Ed, Parental/light slash, depending on how you look at it.

Christmas Present for Diana!, though it really has nothing to do with Christmas, other then the fact that it happens at Christmas eve. Merry Christmas!

Changes

"It's age old, isn't it? Following your dreams, I mean."

"I guess… Though no one seems to anymore. Everyone just gives up." The man gave a dejected huff, "Including myself."

Ed leant back against the sofa he was sitting on in Roy's office. It was the same office, and probably the same sofa, he'd sat on every single time he'd come back to give a report on a mission. Back when he was fifteen and still searching for Al's body, and being delayed almost everyday with a new flyaway mission Mustang sent him on. He'd never appreciated the familiarity of the office back then, though now he was grateful for something that was a constant in his life. No matter what happened, even during the time Roy had fallen to the ranks of an enlisted man, this office had still come back to them. Mustang, back then, was probably doing what had been best for the brothers. He just had funny ways of going about it. Now, at almost nineteen, he could see that, and admit to it. If only in the privacy of his own thoughts.

It was weird, how one day he and Al had been doing research in Germany, preparing for the war that everyone in Europe knew was soon to arrive, and then somehow, by the Gate, the brothers were back in Amestris. Ed wasn't complaining. At least they hadn't brought the war back with them. They'd escaped it somehow - but Ed seriously couldn't find the equivalent exchange in it. They'd been given a second chance, surely, someone on Earth, on the other side of the Gate, had to be suffering. After all, Ed had found out that that was how the Gate really worked. While that depressed him, he _was_ glad to be back home. Even if he talked about places in Europe and no one had a clue what he was on about.

Even if he'd had to reacquaint himself with almost everything he thought he once new in life. Even if he and his brother had to run to catch up with everything that had moved on in their absence. Even if, perhaps, it wasn't fair, that one person's life could be disrupted and fucked about so many Gate-forsaken times!

But no, Ed wasn't complaining. It had been nice to see Winry again at any rate. Though she was now a really busy and famous Automail mechanic who could barely spare the brothers a minute.

It was amazing, how many things had changed. Winry was an _employed_ mechanic, Pinako spent the majority of her time in bed now, Al spent all of his time in Risembool, living the quiet life, after being scarred by the cruelty of things that were happening in Germany. See, it wasn't like he'd specifically sought Roy out, just for a chat or anything. He didn't really want to be in the army anymore, because of all the destruction he'd seen, in both worlds. Yet, at the same time, once he was back in the safe-hold of the old team, something that hadn't seemed to have changed all that much while he was away, leaving them again felt so infinitely wrong that he'd practically begged for his pocket watch back.

Something which Roy had probably found greatly amusing.

The General, as Ed had left him when he'd fallen through the Gate at fifteen, seemed to have had a hard time in Ed's absence, and had returned to being an enlisted man. Ed had never really understood why, but now, at almost nineteen, the past General was now back to being just a Colonel. He had risen through the ranks pretty quickly again, once he decided to try, but now he seemed to have hit a rock in the sight of the new Fuhrer, who didn't seem to find Mustang's talents worthy. The Fuhrer was one whom Ed didn't like, but one who the people did. The Fuhrer's opinion was a crap opinion in Ed's eyes anyway; but he'd never admit that he thought of Mustang as talented or worthy. Ed couldn't help but be pissed off that _some_ _man_ refused to acknowledge someone who had worked for hard. And yes, believe it or not, he was talking about Mustang.

"I didn't think you'd given up on your dreams" Ed eventually muttered, when the silence between them stretched too long. He'd been here reporting on a mission, and somewhere along the line, they'd slipped into chit-chat about how determined Ed had been before Envy killed him. It was still funny to think 'I died, yet here I am, still breathing'. He watched as Roy finally let his pose relax, putting down the report Ed had given him, which he was pretending to make a real job of trying to read. He leant back in his desk chair and surveyed Ed through his one good eye. There was no point in keeping up the professional façade. They'd been chatting for hours, and some time ago they'd realised they were snowed in.

"Do you see me as Fuhrer, commanding that all female officers wear mini-skirts?"

Ed had to let out a tiny laugh, though he'd never tell Mustang that he was funny. Even if, perhaps, Mustang _was_ funny. It was nice to know that Mustang still thought about such stupid things. Mustang, along with his team, was the constant that Ed craved. He paused, for once, thinking before he spoke. He looked around the room, stalling for time, before:

"I didn't think you'd given up on your dreams… but rather, perhaps, your dreams had changed."

He hadn't really meant for the hope to slip into his voice, but now it was done, and there was nothing he could do about it. He saw, out of the corner of his eye (for he certainly wasn't looking at the Colonel), Mustang raise an eyebrow in that way that was undeniably attractive, but mostly annoying.

"Changed how?" The Colonel clarified.

Ed couldn't help but blush. He avoided eye contact, as much as he now began to avoid the subject.

"I dunno… don't you ever think about painting in here?"

If Mustang picked up on Ed's ever so subtle changing of the subject, he was tactful enough not to say anything.

"It's not really my decision. Though yes, a nice blue colour would be better then _this_." He stretched out the last word with as much disgust as he could muster, and they both allowed themselves time to survey the flowery pink, wondering why the building held any right to call itself Military HQ.

Both, of course, were debating if there was any better conversation topic they could use instead of wall paint.

At least, during the festive season, someone had taken it upon themselves to cover it up with a strange array of baubles and tinsel. There was no Christmas tree in the corner, which Edward had found himself used to after two years on Earth. The people on Earth seemed to make a much larger deal of Christmas then Amestris, although the religious side of it seemed somewhat the same.

Ed let his eyes fall lazily outside, where snow was falling heavily, blizzard-like, from the North. Christmas eve, and they'd been snowed in to the office. When Ed had been staying in England, they'd never had snow - just rain and bitter cold. He'd heard tales of Australia, which had barbeques at Christmas time. He shifted on the couch, trying to fight off the urge to hum songs about Santa and his reindeer. Father Christmas was a concept that didn't exist in Amestris.

He hated to admit it, but he was confused by being back in a world full of Alchemy. He'd loved it as a child, and was still one of the most accomplished Alchemists of his time, but now… it was odd to be surrounded by things a whole other world thought impossible. His whole world, according to Earth, was impossible… His home was impossible.

Certainly, _his_ dreams had changed.

"Your dreams…" Ed was the one, in a bought of maturity, that brought them back to the real subject matter. He'd have to talk about it with Roy at some point anyway, he knew. He was a scientist, he need answers, even if this time it was on an emotional level. He twiddled his thumbs and looked at his lap - the picture of a nervous school boy being told off by the headmaster. "Maybe I was being egotistical…" He trailed off. In the end he couldn't say it out loud, it would be too embarrassing if it turned out he was wrong. His voice had barely been above a whisper in the first place, and had they not been alone in the silent office, Roy certainly wouldn't have heard it. As it was, the Colonel heard it nice and clear. He couldn't help but let his tone become accusatory.

"You thought I sunk back to being an enlisted man and gave up alchemy because all of it reminded me of _you_ - the soldier I lost? … The boy I lost. You thought I spent two years of my life living through blizzards in a log cabin just so I could run away from the memories of the time you'd been on my team? You thought I'd tried again now to raise myself back into the ranks of the military simply so I could be close to you again?" He paused. "You thought my dreams had changed to revolve around you?"

Ed could barely keep himself from staying calm. He'd known he'd been wrong. He'd known Roy hadn't cared about him at all…

Mustang sighed; a sound which finally made Ed look up at him.

"Then you'd be right."

Ed could barely believe his ears. He couldn't open his mouth to ask why - he didn't trust himself not to get sappy. Mustang, of course, seemed to be in a hurry to change the subject, or at least direct the attention away from himself.

"What about you?" He asked. "You dreamt of bringing back your mother, and then of getting your brother's body back, and then of stopping the downfall of Amestris." Roy listed them off on his fingers, "No one can say you're not a noble man. What have you ever done for yourself? Didn't your dreams ever… change?"

Ed tried not to preen at being called a man by someone who'd always thought of him as a child. He slumped further on the couch as a burst of wind rattled the window and made the office cold. He couldn't help the lump forming in his throat. He'd wanted to know that there was a chance that the man he'd always respected had cared for him; he hadn't wanted to get on to the subject of his own trials and tribulations - that seemed to have happened a life time ago. He had been so childish back then, and even till the last moments, he'd still been selfish - despite how it may have appeared to Roy.

"They were all for myself, in the end." Roy did the annoying/attractive eyebrow thing again. "I was selfish from the beginning. I wasn't thinking about mum, I just wanted her back for my own needs. I didn't think about all the shit I put Al through, I just knew I'd feel better if I could make him human again… less guilty, you know?"

He stopped, breathing steadily, chest rising and falling every two seconds.

"And the Homunculus?" Roy asked, leaning his elbows on his desk and looking closely at the blonde sat on his sofa. Ed avoided eye contact at all costs.

"I just didn't want to be part of the city that died."

There was a moment of careful consideration. A moment of heavy breathing and thick tension. A moment of silence that stretched between the two, threatening to snap at any moment, but hanging on by the thinnest of thread that could have been despair.

Then Roy laughed.

"You self-depreciating little emotional ball of -"

Though what Ed was a ball of, we'll probably never know, because at that point Ed had picked up on the use of the word 'little', and Roy was forced to duck for cover, rather then finish his sentence.

Some things never change.


End file.
